( source: agencyfaqs.com)
thats from the new pepsi ad. its horrible. the opening shot is of two women singing about the soft and smooth, and the man steps into the scene starting them off on the rough with the smooth (yawn). the women stop fawning over the bottle and instead switch to draping themselves over the guy. closing shot: man appears with an artistic black eye (and otherwise unchanged appearance) and a lipstick smeared face.
scintillating. sex and violence, the two essential facets of male sexuality that go together? its this kind of absolutely thoughtless media message that has so many people thinking violence is a very "normal" part of sexual relationships. when this kind of baggage and destructive conditioning is attached, of all things, to something as unconnected as a fizzy drink, its time to get very worried.
our movies and their way of showing rapes is so irresponsible - i was horrified to learn in the school intervention programs i went for, that so many kids still believe that crap about the woman actually "secretly" enjoying a rape or being pushed into sexual activity. i suppose it was only to be expected, the way our media glamourise violence and sex. look at the current trend of bollywood movies: being a violent killer is a fashion statement now!
dons are hot. so is being an "Agent" - anything as long as its men with guns, anonymous menacing sun glasses, beautiful ultraskinny women hanging on their arms like accessories. what the heck are we trying to say? youre not "man enough" to attract women unless youre going around blowing people's heads off?
unadulterated garbage. not only does this kind of linking of violence with sex make mutually considerate sexual relationships difficult, but it also belittles the thousands of women who get battered, stalked, assaulted and harassed.
by treating violence so casually - making it seem like an almost desirable
aspect of a sexual relationship were refusing to acknowledge how shattering and traumatising these women's experiences have been. of all those images of unreal women we keep seeing in ads and movies, does even one show a glimpse of real life? what the hell are we thinking of.
thank god for campaigns like that one by amnesty international.
UPDATE:a reply to saale -
if i understand you correctly, you wish to know why i think a relationship is being forged between sex and violence.
in my understanding, violence and sex are both employed as status symbols in patriarchy. both glorify the "do-er" because of the masculine aspect of projection. the recipient of the deed however, is objectified.
violence is obviously about domination and aggressively asserting superiority. sex has come to be regarded the same way. its no longer about being in a relationship as much as "whom are you fucking?". the recipient is important only as a testimony to the do-er's status.
patriarchy rejects the notion of another man taking the "weaker" or "passive" role and hence also opposes homosexuality strongly. the myth of male supremacy gets shattered in a homosexual relationship. this very aspect of sex being used to project superiority over the other person is probably also why so much of pornography (based on the objectification of women) features such violent, hardly consensual sex.
patriarchy also condones the use of violence as a legitimate
means to gratify sexual desire. witness the growing incidences of violence against women and children, not to mention against perceived or actually gay men. theres a reason that armies - strongholds of patriarchal culture - use rape as a weapon of war.
the status game is used for both people: the victim "loses face" in admitting a rape, or being beaten by the partner. several women continue living with and finding excuses for abusive partners because in a typically patriarchal society, nobody gives a damn about the woman being abused, and the man is considered "macho" for beating her up. a complaint ironically only fetches the male attention and admiration. it doesnt get the woman support to leave her partner or aid to heal herself and start afresh.
if women find it difficult to speak about having been abused or raped, men have an even more difficult time when they are victims of these crimes, because in patriarchy the male archetype doesnt allow for any vulnerability or "softness" in a man. when a man therefore says that he has been raped, he is rejected for shattering the myth of male invulnerability and supremacy.
and for these reasons, i think its our business to question the linking of violence to sex, and keep opposing mass media's attempt to make us believe that such a relationship is normal, healthy, and (of all things) desirable.
Labels: brownskinspeak, feminist issues